Sunday, September 26, 2010

Matt and KSU

So we got some pretty exciting news around here not to long ago!

Last January at a thing we call the "No Agenda Retreat" I was getting to know one of the other High School Chaperon moms. We were appreciating the friendship our sons were developing and got onto the topic of colleges.

Her son is a year older than Matt. She mentioned that her son, Wes, was planning to go to Kansas State and mostly because of their Army ROTC program. My reaction was really?! I went on to tell her that I was the first generation to abandon ship on KSU. Many of my relatives graduated from Kansas State. I remember thinking wouldn't it be funny if Matt got interested in KSU because of a friend. There was a part of me that was a little sad that KSU wasn't going to be the right school for me when I was 17 years old.

Well one conversation leads to another and Matt just got his acceptance letter to Kansas State University a couple of weeks ago!

It is funny to me what God uses to prepare you for what is coming. Shortly after we moved back to Texas, Greensburg, KS was wiped out by a huge tornado. I watched interviews of the people from the community and surrounding communities. It brought back many great memories. Memories of growing up with salt of the earth, heart of gold type people that Kansas has a reputation for having. I was very sentimental about it in a way that I had not been for a long time. I remember watching as many new stories as I could find on the internet. Then a year or two later, I caught on the Planet Green channel that they were producing a weekly documentary on the rebuilding of Greensburg as a "green community". From time to time they brought in different college teams from KSU and KU to compete on projects etc. I was impressed by the young adults featured in those stories. Interesting...

Some people in Texas struggle to understand why we would be so excited that Matt is headed off to Manhattan, KS to go to school. That's okay. It has only made it more obvious to me what a God thing this whole interest by Matt in KSU has been. It is a great fit for Matt is so many wonderful ways. It is sad to say but true that there were times when I was tempted to think Matt's future was doomed if he wasn't in the top 8% of his class. That kind of thinking would have been a complete waste of time and energy. By the grace of God, we largely avoided it.

We and other members of Matt's family have prayed consistently from the time he was 3 years old for his education. Without a doubt we have seen God direct us every year. When all is said and done we will have done private school, homeschooling and public school. I am happy to give God all the credit for showing us what, where, when and with whom. I certainly was not smart enough to figure it out on my own!

The Love of God

So the Love of God has been popping up as a topic everywhere I turn. For instance...

I'm studying 1 John with a group of women on Tuesday nights and the Love of God is a strong theme in that book.

I'm working through a book called Journey with Jesus. The first quarter of the book focuses on the Love of God.

At church we've been singing songs that stress the Love of God.

A book I picked up this afternoon that I hadn't been reading for at least a month began with a chapter title called "From Fear to Love".

The section of a book called Soul Cravings that I started this weekend had the title "Love Lost and Abandoned"

I've realized this week that I have been strongly motivated by fear, performance, wisdom, desire to avoid pain and shame.

What would life be like if I was first and primarily motivated by the love of God?

For years I have been in the question... What would life be like if I trusted God? I think there is a possibility that the focus is shifting from trust to love. I think its pretty cool that so much time was spent on the issue of trust. It makes more sense to me than ever that we did spend so much time there. I am both overwhelmed and excited about what will happen in my life (over time) if the love of God is more deeply embraced and understood and then shared.

In the next nine months, I will be held in that conversation by different commitments I have already made. I am grateful.

Thursday, September 02, 2010

Spinning

My head is spinning!

So many things I have been waiting for I am not longer waiting for. There is a green light. We have passed Go! And may even collect $200.00.

Waiting really was necessary.

Green lights really were needed.

Not a day early or a day late.

Waiting is not for cowards.

Trusting God and depending on God in the middle of the green lights isn't either.

Waiting without bitterness is some of the best training ground on the planet.