November 19th - last blog entry. Wow! Shocked!
Longest ever between posts. I've missed writing here. I think about it often but today is the first evening I've had "extra time" in I don't even know how long.I love that I really missed writing. It's happening. I'm becoming a writer. One who likes to write.
My life got busy. Not the kind of busy where I booked up every minute with the things I love to do busy. But the kind of busy where you have to pull more than your own weight for a season. I really can't remember the last time that happened to me. It included things like my dear mother-in-law having double replacement knee surgery. Neither parent could drive, etc, etc.
And, in the middle of December I was offered a ministry position that is such a great match for my passions. That job begins in mid-January. But related to the theme of getting busy... I found myself in a perfect storm scenario at work. Let's just say this is the hardest I have ever had to work leading up to leaving a position in my working life. I'm still afraid of the challenges I'm leaving behind for the next person. And praying often that we get more done than seems possible in the next 10 days.
So in light of all this, I have found myself praying every morning through my day. What is necessary today? Or, Dear Lord, please surprise me with inspiration and timing that gets more things done than I expect is possible. Give me grace with other. Please help me not get short with the people I love when I don't really know how all of this is going to come together. There was increased pressure and at the same time a quiet confidence that characterized most of my days the last month. I did get those perfect timing, 15 minute, I know just what to buy shopping trips in. I truly got to enjoy quiet, peaceful, delightful moments with my family. As well as the pleasure of time with some of our friends.
Looking ahead: I've been praying about this new season that is about to begin. I'm praying about setting up a schedule that makes sense for the rhythms and responsibilities of my day and for my new co-workers. I take hope in knowing that knees will mend and the urgency of leaving a job will end and all the "Merry Christmas" (on top of everything else) is gone away. I will transition into a new set of things to pray about at the beginning of each day. Maybe I will be back in a season that doesn't consistently look impossible.
Reflecting back: My words will fall short here. When I received the new job the only words that seemed appropriate were hallelujah and thank you. I know the decision to let go of my CPA license in 2003 and to trust God to equip me and prepare me for a new kind of work has taken me to unexpected places and given me unexpected relationships and that most of the time during that time it did not make a lot of sense. But today, looking back, I can see the hand of God and the wisdom of God and faith provided by God. It's all grace is more comprehensible to me than ever before. I can see that I am a better at trusting and persevering when I don't know what the heck is going on. I've learned to let go of the illusion of control more quickly. I'm truly excited to see how God will use all that He has invested in me. I'm also very grateful for all the people that have been a part of this journey with me. It's actually taken a rather large tribe.
I am
thankful
blessed
hopeful
equipped
dependent
changing
willing
excited
in awe
as ready as I'll ever be to live a new chapter in my beloved little life.
May God bless and keep you, make his face to shine right down on you and grant you His everlasting peace! With love, Cheri
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