Have you ever looked back on a time period in your life and said, "Now I get it God!"
It feels like I'm having that conversation with God almost hourly the last few days. Light bulb moments are firing off faster than I can remember them. I keep thinking God I want to have time to write down everything you're doing because I want to remember.
I've also noticed that in relationships with people, especially the parent child relationship, a parent says, "Just do what I'm telling you." Sometimes parents say this because they don't have time to explain or they're to tired. Other times it is because their child is not ready to comprehend the reasons why. And still others the parent doesn't really know "why" well enough to explain it themselves. And then when the child comes around to seeing the wisdom of the instruction or action a parent can be very tempted to have an, "I told you so attitude."
Looking back I think there were times when God said, "I just can't explain what I'm doing yet. You just wouldn't understand." But instead of feeling hung out to dry in those moments, I felt a calling to persevere with hope. A call to believe in God's goodness.
Its one thing to believe God is good when things are going smoothly and linearly. Its quite another when God takes seriously your desire to be transformed by Him into his likeness and therefore his perspectives. Because letting go of earthly values can be very difficult and even heartbreaking. But not I can see so many purposes in wandering around in the desert. I needed time away from what was my normal in order to have eyes to see and ears to hear what God wanted to show me.
A crazy part of that journey was that I was wandering around in the desert with people who were in their homelands the last four years. Their love and hospitality went a long way towards making the spiritual desert experience survivable. But it was never meant to be our homeland as well.
So what's my point? If you find yourself in circumstances that don't make sense to you. You wish God would lighten up. Hang on tight to the truth that God loves you. If you have told God that you will go an do and be wherever and whatever He wants you to be, there will be some sifting out of earthly perspectives and their will be some fires for refining. But on the other side of the sifter and the fire there is love for God that can be obtained no other way. I truly trust Him more than I ever have before.
You are blowing me away. I am flabbergasted by your orchestration of the details of my life. I am just one little soul on the planet of billions of people. I also watch you doing these things in lives of people I love. Lord, help us all to put our faith in you every single day. Give us opportunities to testify with love and gentleness and humility about who you are and what your up to. Help us not to squander what you've done in our hearts and the resources you have given us. Thank you for providing what we need to hang on to you when things just don't seem to add up. We love you Lord and we want to learn to love you more.